More Holidays

Zack Urlocker
Sunday, August 25, 2002

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Did you ever notice how Europeans get six weeks of vacation a year? No wonder they're always coming over to the US and crowding our national parks. You see 'em smoking their cigarettes and eating pizza with a knife and fork. Clearly, what the US high-tech economy needs is a few more holidays to even things out. So here's our follow up list of new obscure holidays.

10. Report your boss to the SEC day -- You can even call collect

9. Soylent Green day -- No thanks, I had that for breakfast

8. National crank phone call day -- Ah, is your fridge running?

7. Sue your parents day -- Hey, they started all your problems

6. Lactose tolerance day -- I just can't stand intolerance

5. National insurance fraud day --This just burns me up

4. American Non-alcoholic beer day -- Why bother?

3. Telemarketing appreciation day -- Begins just when you sit down for dinner

2. Canadian culture day -- Pretty much the same as in the US

1. Romance-a-programmer day -- Be sure to wear a clean t-shirt

About the author
Zack Urlocker is a pseudonym for a Silicon Valley software executive.